When are there problems in a marriage? The answer is when both parties are in defence mode and no longer try to understand the other party during a conflict.
Standing up for ourselves is a real killer in a relationship.
It’s human nature to always want to be right. It’s human nature to want to defend ourselves against accusations or criticisms. It’s human nature to not take feedback positively. But we can rise above human nature by being mindful in our relationships.
Many relationships fail because one or both parties fail to try to understand what their partner is saying or how they’re feeling.
We are quick to disregard our partner’s request just because we don’t see the same issue with equal importance as our partner. And this immediately makes our partner feel small and unimportant to us. If it happens often, they will feel more distant from us, paving the way to a broken marriage.
So the number one tip for a happy marriage is:
No matter how much you disagree, try to understand from your partner’s point of view.
And before I go, here’s Marriage advice from 1500 people. It’s a great sum-up. Have a read.